I was given a piece of advice at the beginning of my pregnancy that rightly or wrongly i ignored, the advice was "don't read any of the books" I was given all the books i have, so one excuse i have is that i didn't actively go out and purchase them, and to be fair the first few months of my pregnancy i devoured them, most of them have a week by week account of what to expect, including side effects, and regardless of how many nieces / nephews i have (7) how many of my friends that have children (the majority) i have never actually lived daily through someones pregnancy so 99% of the information was news to me. I also joined http://www.babycentre.co.uk/ who send you a weekly update detailing approximate size & weight of your
baby (with lots of vegetable comparisons) and what developmental stage your unborn is at, which i loved,
I don't ever comment or ask questions on the online forums but there were occasions i looked through other discussions of other mum-to-be and found useful answers (much to the amusement of my elder relatives who scoff at the thought of using the internet to find answers to pregnancy or medical related questions...."what did we do before the internet????" they say, i have genuinely NO idea, lie awake worrying? ask a neighbour?
I do have concerns the information available online can fuel some womens fears, especially those with even slight hypochondriac tendencies and have warned a newly pregnant friend to avoid Google to avoid any irrational worrying, your midwife is there for any questions you have, at my Hospital they encouraged you to call them should we be worried, as its better safe than sorry.
So this is were i am at, books read, almost everything prepared, Braxton Hicks kicking in every night (for those unfamiliar with the term these are pains downstairs brought on by my uterus contracting in preparation for labour, which i have to be truthful feel like mini lightening bolts where the sun don't shine) and Edema (more commonly known as swelling / water retention) in full force on every limb, putting a cup of tea down on the patio yesterday i was told i looked like an Olympic weight lifting champion, on the bright side at least i am of Olympic standard, heaven forbid i just look like a weight lifter!
But I have a complaint to make, I am now 10 away from my due date, and on day 3 of official Maternity leave, which feels a bit like a holiday, but with a hint of guilt attached (cleaning eases the guilt, and they say cleanliness is close to godliness, which makes me practically angelic these days, my friend insinuated last week my oven was far too clean to be used regularly, in my new role as a stepford wife i took this as a huge compliment) my complaint is that i have heard, read about and lived through the negative side to pregnancy, i am having to remind myself there is soon to be a little bundle of wonder less to make it all worth while.
I can list the negatives related to having a baby off by heart, starting with the below...
* Weight gain ( and never regaining pre baby figure)
* Lack of sleep (pre and post baby)
* Strained relationships
* Career implications
* Impossible life juggling
Am i being naive but are things really going to be that bad? does the good not out weigh the bad? I have read so many articles about "Women who want it all" those who dare to juggle motherhood and home life with a career, and dare i suggest it, a life of their own, and rarely do the stories i read have a happy ending, am pretty sure daytime television watching and Daily Mail online reading has accelerated these feelings but I am worried sick i am hurtling towards becoming a a bitter, overweight, neurotic, Jeremy Kyle watching, Loose Women quoting elasticated waistband wearing slummy mummy....and i havent even had the baby yet...I need some warm fuzzy thoughts sent my way, pronto.